Category: Poems

Presenting the wandering poet, and it’s tracklist:

1. broken dreams and tried strings
   …and i see the rain on the roof, crash down with a vengeance,
   perhaps another wronged soul, making their peace,
   with a fallen foe, a broken path and the cracked windows…
2. misunderstood (the real me)
   …not doing this
   for sympathy
   not doing this
   for attention
   like you may think i am…
3. truth (the real me)
   …but truth is a sin
   and sin is a crime
   and crime is the only thing
   keeping me alive
   tonight…
4. dream (the real me)
   …you can steal my life
   but you can’t steal my right
   to dream, to see, to believe…
5. freedom (the real me)
   …in these restless binds
   here i lie chained
   laying in waste in your controlling hate…
6. existence (the real me)
   …good may not prevail over evil
   but an imitation of good, well, that just might do the trick…
7. paradox (the real me)
   …they told me to write something radical
   be the punk-rock type or be the exclusionist metaphor
   does this suffice for you?
   does this work for your precious little stereotypes?
8. sadist (the real me)
   …but you say, ‘No.’
   and it feels like the world has come crashing…
9. writings on the wall – a broken dreams and tried strings edit
   …this feels like the room with yellow wallpaper,
   and i’m clawing desperately,
   trying to break free…

I hope you enjoy reading the wandering poet. Subscribe to Anvi’s Thoughts Caught to receive updates on my poems.

Presenting – the wandering poet and tracklist

Until the next time I get inspired by something wild, beautiful and ethereal,
ANVI TUTEJA

Don’t worry, dear readers – I’m perfectly fine after writing this…made me feel much better, not depressed 🙂
And I’d say it was pure fiction, and it is (but only barely.)
Also, maybe a bit different than my other poetry in wandering poet or the real me, but is actually fresh writing (and promises hope for the future, perhaps something like illusion or optional nostalgia), unlike Transcript, which spent three months in my drafts before I felt I could publish it.)

sometimes i don’t know why i keep trying
looking for your fleeting approval
you’ve got me running around
wrapped around your little finger
searching for something
anything
that could make you feel like you were worth something

but you say, ‘No.’
and it feels like the world has come crashing
first, second, or last
if it doesn’t even matter
why do i try one, two, three, four thousand times?
the losing side, don’t even try
the ones who win by losing are the real illusionists

the tears are a comfort now
my only solace is the freezing isolating warmth
silently rolling down my cheeks
i used to want to die
that was then
i already know i’m dead
that is now

melodrama was my greatest companion
but misery loved company
till i came stumbling ‘round here
i feel like i’m a lifetime older
loneliness is the greatest hell
you can never escape alone
guess i’m spending an eternity down here

another thing i didn’t know way back when
back Before it happened
was sometimes i’d come to long for this
comforting fleeting make-you-feel-alive
– optional nostalgia –
does this make sense?
guess i’m so far gone i don’t really care

ANVI TUTEJA
Could This Really Be The Ending?

(On a lighter note: above I used a parethesis in a parenthesis! Frequent readers would know all about my love for parenthesis thanks to this post: That One Time I Murdered a Ginger Bread Man.)
If you need some of my lighter poetry, perhaps try Stories, Queen of Nowhere, Black and White, or of course, the love anthem called Love Yourself Like I Do Myself.
Collection of my poetry: POEMS: https://anvituteja.com/category/poems/.

In other light news, I achieved first place in a school competition. (yay!) It was a debate about water shortage. I’ll publish my speech here too; the issue is INCREDIBLY concerning in the current times, and I hope we can all work together to achieve SDG 6: Clean Water and Sanitation.